Tell the World I am Coming Home

Okay.  I lied. I am NOT coming home (yet). 

 

June 1, 2014 marked my arrival back in the States, after being gone for 11 months while on The World Race.  June 3, 2014 (a year ago today at the time of writing this blog) I found myself crossing through the Neche/Gretna border and (finally) arriving HOME in good ol’ Altona, Manitoba.  I remember both days, like it just happened.  The feelings and emotions of coming off way to many hours in a plane and the worst travel day ever, to the anticipation of seeing my parents.  From the sadness of realizing that I would have to say ‘good-bye’ to my race friends, who had become my family over the year that passed, to the joy that filled my heart with the thought of seeing my youth girls after a year.  If there was ever a time for an emotional roller coaster ride; those 72 hours were it.

Airport hugs after 11 months

I thought I knew what laid before me in the upcoming year.  I thought I would be attending school at Providence in the summer, working in A-Town and getting to know a new group of grade 9 youth girls.  Since I had no plans to travel within the year, I had already accepted the fact that I would be celebrating my ‘one year’ at home simply ‘living life’ and working a normal 9-5 job.  Clearly God had other plans for me as, ironically enough, only ONE of my original plans actually came true my first year back at home.

What is even more ironic is that, on June 1, 2015 I found myself thousands of miles away from ‘home’ at a place that I can honestly say never crossed my mind a short year ago.  I was in the African sun, at the Immigration office in Ndola, Zambia, waiting to get the visas in our passports renewed for another month.  As I held my freshly stamped passport I thought to myself, “Has it really been a year? Have I really been back in Zambia for a month already?  Is this all just some sort of a bizarre dream? Am I really going to go back to the school later today to hang out with some of the world’s most amazing (trust me, I have looked) kids?

Grace Academy

In the span of a year, so very much can change.  While on the race, especially while in Swaziland and South Africa, my heart yearned for the people of Zambia.  For my feet to return to the place of Grace and those lives that have been saved by it.  Yet today, less than a year home from the race, I am back at this place. 

 

On my ‘one year home’, instead of spending the day working 9-5, I spent it giving a short English lesson, renewing my visa for my passport, eating Nishma with my fingers, and I played Frisbee with about a dozen kids.  In the evening, I listened to a few kids practice their reading out loud, and watched the beautiful colours of an African sunset. 

Indeed, God is Good.

God is so very good.

Worship

So, here it is...an update..one i have been meaning to do for a while.  How am I doing now, compared to last post?  Honestly?  Better.  Still not 100% but I know that that will take time.  since I last posted, I have had a number of chats with people in person, through email, skype, telephone and facebook and all of them have been really good and a lot of them have been super encouraging as well.  It is good to know that in this battle we are fighting, we are NOT alone...Praise be to God for that and so much more!  Work has proven to be a blessing other that the fact that its a job and I am getting paid there. and yes, there are days when i do not want to be there, but it has proven to be a blessing in the sense that I have a lot of time to think, which some days is not good, but others, it allows time for me to spend it in prayer.  To really pray for family and friends  and for those around me.  Through that, what I have discovered is that I need to be in constant communication with God.  like Hello "duh" nikki, the Bible mentions that, doesnt take a genius to figure that out...well actually it was a song by Big Daddy Weave to remind me of that.  I also realized that having the latest Christian song in my head during work isnt a bad thing either (though side note, sometimes it is really annoying having a certain song in your head that you just cant get out!), because I mean after all...that is worship as well, singing praises to God.

So then what the heck has been "wrong" with me lately?  Though i still think it has been a number of litttle different things (which after a while just add up) the biggest thing is My relationship with God.  Now, not sure if I have ever experienced spiritual warfare but honestly, thats what i think a big thing of it was...thats the only thing that makessense.  There was one day last week where I just lost it.  I was literally on my knees crying.  No, God did not miraculousy speak to me or anything like that, but after that, I just had this sense of peace, like it would be ok.  A few days after that, my aunt called for something and she mentioned/asked somethign on the phone which struck me....it was something along the lines of, "you sound better, you sound happy!".  now this struck me cause I dont recall even talking to my aunt at all during my "down time" so how would she know how I sounded then? but yah since then, things havegotten better.  Yes there are still moments, but those moments will always be there.  But so will faith, and so will God.  With Him, I know anything is possible and I just gotta keep believing that, hold strong to my faith and never let go