Home Sweet Home: Summer 2016

Summer 2016 has been an interesting (and strange) summer for me.  The funny, and slightly ironic, thing is I’ve barely left my small Mennonite home town that I’ve grown up in.  This summer marked the first summer in 3 years that I have worked full time hours.  That simple reason, played a large part into me ‘staying put’.  However, even with working, I have been able to maximize my evenings, weekends and the long weekends to their fullest potential.  In turn, I have not felt as though I have somehow ‘missed out’ on summer. For that, I am thankful.
 

Unknown to me at the start of it, summer 2016 also proved to be a summer in which I would continue to wrestle intensely within my own heart.  While I still stand by what I have said in earlier posts about being at peace with where God has me now, I’ve been realizing lately that I have this ongoing need to ‘process’ key events over the last few years of my life to help me continue to grow personally and spiritually.  Thank you to those who continue to walk alongside me in this rollercoaster journey.  As part of this journey, I am trying to figure out different ways in which will allow me to share/process/heal/learn from the many adventures.  In the past, I have always turned to journaling privately- recording thoughts, feelings and emotions of a certain place, moment, story, or event.  Capturing moments on a photograph, has also helped in this as well.  Thank you to a wonderful APP called “Timehop”, each day I am treated to photos, posts, status updates and much much more on a daily basis.  

So what does any of this have to do with anything?  

There is a saying that goes, “Home is where the Heart is”.  While I don’t disagree with this statement, I find that it brings about a whole new set of challenges and heartaches-especially when one’s heart is scattered around the globe.  I find myself asking, ‘If home is where the heart is, what happens when your heart isn’t in one exact place-but in multiple places on earth?  What happens when we are in one location, doing what we love to do, but our hearts yearn to be elsewhere with the people who are there”?  If home is where the heart is, then where is my home?”

“Timehop”, along with a recent post by a world race teammate, recently got me thinking to the people, places, cultures, stories, emotions and events in which I have not chosen to share for whatever reasons-specifically in regards TO my World Race experiences.  So, I have decided that, at least once a month, I will post a blog about the country I was in three years ago while ON the World Race.  I am not quite sure how this will fully take forum yet.  Some months it may simply be a photo blog, while others maybe a combination of race blogs I posted at the time along with personal journal entries.  Other months, may simply highlight my teams ministry contacts and share about the on going work that they are continuing to be apart of.  After all; it is through them and their wide range of passions and ‘callings’, that have truly inspired and taught me about life and what it means to live a life of sacrifice.

Encouraged

Today was another one of those days that-through the stories of other people-I was encouraged.  For those that say "God doesnt exists" or "He is un loving and doesnt care about me"-part of me just wants to laugh (especially about the part about Him not existing...cause one look around nature-should speak otherwise-but thats not what this post is about).   I heard it said recently that people can (and do) argue the facts of the Bible till they are 'blue in the face', or they may not agree at all or anything with the teachings in the Bible BUT one thing they can not argue-are personal, life stories that people (Christians and non Christians alike) have.  One may choose NOT to believe their stories-but they cannot argue them by saying that it "didnt happen' or something like that.  That is the power in those stories.  That is a main reason why I LOVE hearing testimonies and just "God Stories" of things happening in people's lives.  It is so encouraging.

Through people's stories-you also realize that you are NOT alone on this Christian journey.  That other people have similar struggles to you (and, in some cases-they are almost the same).  I have found in my life, that it is encouraging as well to know that you are not alone-that it is ok to be mad at God, to yell at Him and to ask the famous question..."why?"

I know people struggle with these concepts.  I know from personal experience that I have too, struggled with this concept.  But really-God created every emotion and feeling.  If there is ever anyone who can handle someone being mad at them-its God.  The crazy awesome thing is-He loves us so much that He wont let go-WE might let go-but HE never will.  Its too bad that we often think that it is HIM who lets go of us.  We cannt be more wrong in that line of thinking.

One thing I am struggling with/wrestling with, as of late, is to know how to share that love-to remind people (especially young girls/women) of their worth in God.  I am struggling with this cause God has been remindng me just how awesome HE is and how much HE loves us-and for me NOT to be able to share it/show it-is tough.  I hope and pray that my actions speak louder than words-that people will be able to SEE God through me.

I have been encouraged lately with that very thought.  I have had a few different people mention to me different things along those same lines and that in itself, speaks so much to me!

"I'll stand with arms high and heart abandoned.  In awe of the One who gave it all!  I'll stand, my soul Lord to You surrendered, all I am-is Yours  "